Interview

This is a link to one of the girls testimonies.  It's rather long but gives a really good picture of the life that these girls have lived.  If you don't have facebook email me and I'll send it.

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1480140617#!/notes/megan-clapp/a-friends-story-of-being-abducted-by-the-lra/423998931606

New York

Got to New York just fine.  I fell asleep on the tarmac in France but woke up before takeoff.  Somehow I managed to miss the fact that there was a bomb scare and the terminal was evacuated during that time.  I didn't find out why we were late until I arrived in New York and heard other passengers talking about it!

I think no matter where you go you always have that moment when you realize that it’s over for the time being.  Your tan fades.  You go back to where it’s snowing.  Someone honks at you and you snap back to reality.

Last time I left Africa it hit me when I heard a little American boy shout on the airplane that “at least we don’t have to share the tvs like last flight!”  Bam.  Back.

This time the moment was more subtle.  I was neatly folding up the plastic cellophane wrapping that my fourth airline blanket of the day came in.  I thought of how kids in Kitgum make kites out of pieces of trash just like this.  And have a great time flying them.

I love it there.

France

Made it out of Egypt and I'm now in France.  After having to go through security here three times because of wrong directions and a general lack of screens showing flight gates, I'm finally where I should be and have an hour left until I journey to New York where I'll spend the night with Brian.  Catch you later!

It could be worse

Just learned that one family of 5 has been in this room for 6 days and another for 4.  Anyhow, our's is going through and we should be on the plane in an hour or so!

Flying home

So I made it from Uganda to Ethiopia to Sudan and I'm now sitting in Egypt.  Everything has been uneventful thus far.  I'm hoping to keep it that way.  It's now 4:30am my time and I have about 3 hours until my next flight to France... I'm not feeling tired, hungry, thirsty or anything.

However, I should be feeling all of the above.

Also, I'm not quite sure what's happening at the moment.  I'm transferring to a different airline so I had to get my bags but not get a visa for Egypt.  That didn't seem to go over real well but at least there were about 4 others doing the same.  Anyhow, I have my luggage and they have us in some kind of holding room and they took our passports and spoke a lot of Arabic.

Haha I'm not so sure what that means but I think it'll all be good.

So the girls at the Centre all woke up to say goodbye at 4:30 this morning thanks to Colline who went to each hut and banged on the door!  I'm going to miss them a ton.

Then made it safely to Kampala.  My cook Concy came with me on the bus.  She doesn't travel much so she wanted to pray before going.  It started like this - "God, please don't let me vomit like last time I was on a bus."  Haha anyway we made it vomit free the whole way.

Then got pick pocketed.  I stepped off the bus, stuck my phone in the side pocket of my backpack and took a few steps.  A guy pushed against me and lo and behold he stole my phone out of my bag and sped away.  I swiftly yelled to him that he was an idiot and to give me back my phone.  He did.  I think that's what Jesus teaches you to do in this type of situation?

Then caught up with Phil, Suzan and Silver in K'la and hung out with them all day.  Right now we're all hanging out at Suzan's house eating the wonderful cake that Concy made for me to take back to America (sorry mom and dad, I don't think it would have made it in one piece).  Tomorrow I have some errands to run, chilling to do and a plane to catch in the evening.  Then starts my trek home.

Good byes

I hate goodbyes.  I've never been very good at them, I get all kinds of nostalgia about the past, how the kids will change, how things won't be the same next time I come etc.  The group of girls that has been living at the Centre while I have been here has been amazing, each in their own way.  Whereas last time only a few who spoke English well told me their whole stories, this time many of them wanted to talk, either through a translator or broken English.

So today I spent the day doing all my last minute bonding time with the children and girls.  I bought soda for them for dinner which they ended up quarreling about because 3 kids didn't get one.  It left me feeling crappy that it caused a problem instead of just being fun.  But they quickly made up for that when they started with the goodbyes and thank yous.  I swear if I was told I am beautiful and that I'm loved half as much in the State's as I was today I'd be a different person!

After about an hour of that they decided to escort me to my house.  So 25 of the women and I walked across the compound.  Scratch that.  25 women carried me like a rock star in a crowd to my house.  It was hilarious, I've never laughed so hard.  After some more time they began to go back to their beds but some lingered around to have private conversations about the future etc.

It was a good day. One of the girls said she wants just a little piece of my heart in hers.  I realized that so much of my heart already is in Kitgum.  I love feeling so at home here.  I'm going to miss it so much.


Last minute prayer requests:
Electricity!  My phone battery is almost dead, my computer is almost dead (I have an internet modem) and the only ATM in Kitgum that accepts my ATM card wasn't functional today.  Thus, I am now unsure how I am going to pay for my bus ticket to Kampala at 5:30 tomorrow morning.

I'm lying under my mosquito net, listening to dogs barking, a cow mooing and Shania Twain playing far off in the distance.  I am in serious denial about leaving here in less than 36 hours.  Fortunately, I do believe that I will be coming back here, and soon I hope.  When I tell people I'm in university they're either shocked that I'm old enough or shocked that I haven't finished yet.  I'm not sure why I can never be my age, but I don't mind.

I spent today figuring out all kinds of last minute things in preparation for my being absent.  The scholarships should be able to run smoothly from here on out, at least I'm praying for that outcome.  It has also been hectic trying to see everybody, and I really enjoy sitting with people, talking, or just being silent together but being in a rush is not conducive to such long conversations.  However, I'm blessed that I have had plenty of time for this in the past weeks.

Today the kids all got new shoes and bounced around the compound all day with them.

Making Peace

Sorry about the frustration of my last post, it was a knee-jerk reaction from being protective of the girls here.

The fact is this could have been anyone unfamiliar with the situation asking such questions in a moment of excitement or anxiety from hearing such extreme stories.  I know she was just doing her job trying to hear from different categories of women that are here at the Centre and she may not have known how well they understand English.  She made a mistake and caught me on a day that I was feeling incredibly protective since I am soon leaving here and I want them to be in the best possible condition when they return to their own communities in two weeks.

That being said, I'd love to hear all the things that I've messed up by saying in the past!  I'm sure I would be horrified!

Frustration

So there's an American woman who came to visit today from an NGO.  Working with an NGO you would expect them to be extremely sensitive to the cases that we're working with here.  Instead she asked things like "when you were trained by the LRA, did you ever fight in a battle?"  Here that question would be comparable to asking a soldier you don't know if he killed people during the war. Or maybe even worse because the people the child soldiers were forced to kill here were from their own communities.  That's not a question for the general public to know.

I was embarrassed after that one but it got worse when she requested to have one more testimony "from the one girl with HIV/AIDS"  She asked plenty loud enough for everyone, including the only girl here who has AIDS to hear clearly.  Everybody looked at her at which point she had to leave the room because she was crying from being labeled as "that one girl with AIDS."  It took her 5 weeks to tell  me her story, she wasn't about to do it for completely strangers.

If you're ever in a situation like this, in the States or elsewhere, talk with people beforehand and find out what's appropriate in the culture before humiliating whoever you are talking with.

Today was interesting.  The man who donated the funds for the New Life Centre came to visit from the States.  He's an older man  but he is active and loves the Lord. Two other Americans came with him for their first time.  It was fun to see their reactions to the activities here - they laughed and cried.

The girls did a great job with entertainment and such.  We had testimonies, dancing, singing, devotions, relay races and netball.  Good times.

One of the girls, Brenda, told her story today.  Her father is a drunkard and has beaten her for years.  Growing up she had to work for relatives in order to pay her PTA fees for school (about $5 a term for primary).  And when she'd enroll her father would beat her and tell her she was wasting her time because she'd never succeed, but she went anyway.  The father even held her at gunpoint at one point in his anger.

The first week she was here she told me that she'd love to go back to school.  She graduated Primary and wants to pursue secondary.  Brenda asked again today (she doesn't know that she's already on the list).  I asked her what her father would say about her continuing her education.  She responded very matter-of-factly "he'll beat me."  The desire this girl has for an education is incredible.  While we're hoping her sister will allow her to move in with her so she can avoid the abuse of the father, it's telling that she would be willing to be beaten so she can go to school.




I'm beginning to get sad because people are starting to talk about how I'm leaving on Sunday.  I could stay here longer. I love the community so much, I feel so at home here.

Frozen Water

New game!  Put ice in a kids hand and watch their reaction.  It's hilarious, especially when they eat it and scrunch up their little faces.

Aber and Avatar

Aber.

I've created a new game I like to call Weird Kids out with American Things.

For instance, you show a 3 year old a video clip of their mom on your computer and watch them run behind the screen to see how she got in there.  Show a kid a full sized mirror.  Let them play with a faucet.  Teach them the chicken dance.  Put their picture on the projector.

Today I put Avatar on for some of the kids.  None of the moms were around so I had no help with translations but they were asking me so many questions about the movie.  I have no idea what they asked but I assume it was something like "why are these people blue?"  or "is this real?" or "is this what people look like in America?"  I would have loved to know.



On to a more serious note, one of the girls, Janet, called her husband from my phone today.  He abandoned her while she was pregnant with her daughter, Aber (meaning, "Beautiful).  She called to ask him to pay the school fees of Innocent, her 5 year old son.  When they finished she told me a bit more about him.  I knew from before that he had cheated on her and gave her and her (then baby) daughter AIDS.  She told me today that "he likes women too much."  That all he does is go from woman to woman.  This man knows that he has AIDS and yet he has sex with as many women as possible.

Should this be illegal?  If a man knows that he is infected should he have to inform the women before he sleeps with them?


Janet then explained how worried she is about her daughter's future and that her only hope is to go back to school for tailoring to make a bit of money for school fees etc. since she's often too tired from being sick to work in the fields.

She's actually on our list of girls to receive a scholarship but she hasn't been informed yet (as we're trying to avoid jealousy among the girls), I'm praying that she can use this boost to lessen her fears of failing her kids.

updateee

This week has been really busy.  The donor who paid for the New Life Centre to open is coming tomorrow to see how things are going.  I'm working on making a video of all the staff and girls etc.  I love video editing but I don't have the software I like and it has taken ages to compile.  On top of that we're still cranking out work on the scholarships!

So here's an update:

The woman who went into labor last week is STILL waiting.  The pains have been on and off and since she lost a lot of fluid they want her to remain in the hospital.  She's going a bit stir crazy, says if it doesn't come by the end of the week she's running away!  She doesn't speak any English so one of the other girls translates for me.  When I leave I always say to her stomach in Acholi, "Baby, come here today!"  Hasn't worked yet but I'll keep trying.

We have 41 girls who are set to start primary, secondary or vocational schools!  I'm extremely happy with how well things have gone.  I never expected my tiny "these girls should be able to go back to school" to work like this, way to go God.  I'm also working on writing up stories about them to send to all those who supported this.  I'll mail them out once I get home!

In other news, one of our kids fell and split his forehead open today :-/

Speaking of kids, I absolutely love all of the kids at the Centre, I would stay here just for them.  I'm pretty sure you may have gathered that from past posts but I'm not sure if you know how much I enjoy them.



So during the day I think of all these things I want to post about and then I sit down to write this and I have nothing.  


Oh funny story, two of my friends were laughing about how short my basketball shorts are that I wear to bed here (I was hanging my laundry).  I explained that they are actually long shorts compared to most.  They were astonished that we wear something that exposing, that we "don't respect our bodies."

I then made mention of the fact that we would never step outside of our bedroom without a shirt on.  (In the villages women can sit outside of their house without a shirt and there are moms breastfeeding everywhere you go.)  I was reminded of our Africa introduction session before I came here last time when they said "knees are the boobs of Africa."

They laughed so hard by the fact that we consider a woman's chest to be private, that even if breastfeeding women use a blanket or something to cover.  I don't think I've ever seen them laugh so hard.  Ohh culture, you're a funny thing.

Stories from the Bush

Today was pretty intense.  I've been working on this video for the Centre and decided to interview two of the girls about their experience when they were abducted.  I was expecting for them to be timid in discussing it, especially with the camera around.  But they talked without pausing for well over a half an hour each.

The first video of a girl named Coline starts out with "When I was abducted they forced me to lie with my Uncle's son as husband and wife in a field of sweet potatoes.  After that I was given to a very old man.  When I complained to the elders, they dug a deep hole and put me in it.  When that punishment was over they caned me."

I have no idea what they said during most of it (I'll have the rest translated tomorrow) but with the little I know of the Acholi language I could decipher some of it.  One of the girls used hand motions that universally mean somebody's head was being cut off.  She used this reference on multiple occasions.

They both kept a completely strait face the whole time.  Didn't show any weakness.  It wasn't until later in the afternoon, when the cameras were off, that I saw Coline crying.

How is it already July 21!?! 

Health

So one of the girls at the Centre was taken to the hospital with labor pains on Sunday.  It seemed that her water broke.  Buttt she's still there and hasn't given birth.  In the US we'd induce labor in about 12 hours but that's risky here since if inducing doesn't work they need to do a c-section.  So, it's been 48 hours - no baby.

Just be praying for her, the chances of infection for her and her baby are much higher now.

Oh and there are two hospitals in Kitgum, the government hospital has run out of sterilization equipment, AKA if anyone needs any kind of invasive treatment they can't get it.  They also have no doctors on most of the wings.  Their sonogram machine is broken.  And if someone breaks something they can't get a cast because the plaster thing doesn't work anymore either.

Never complain about our healthcare, regardless of our problems we have state of the art equipment and facilities.

Church

So I got a call at 6:40 this morning from my cook Concy.  "Meg - are you coming to church?"  "I'm in bed Concy"  "Me too but I'm coming to get you."  I usually go to church at the service that's held on our compound but Concy always asks me to come to hers.  So I got out of bed today and headed out with her.

Thankfully for me, the early service is in English so I understood both the songs and the sermon - which I think is a first... ever.  So we jumped, danced and "ayayayayaed."  The church has a ton of people from FH, three of the pastors are coordinators at FH, the guy playing the keyboard is the guy that washes vehicles and cuts the grass, three people in the choir are on staff and the charismatic man leading worship is the quiet office assistant who sweeps and makes tea.  Lots of others are also members.  It's fun to see them in another context

So I sat there really enjoying the service, even with the small kid who sat next to me and just rubbed my arm to see if my color would show up on his hand.

I'm on the way to the orphanage now!

Peace

My name shall be _________ today.

I have mastered the fine art of responding to any western name that people yell to me when I'm walking down the road.  There aren't very many white people in Kitgum and many people tend to think we're all related.  Even my boda driver always tells me about how he saw my sister somewhere in town.  And people are convinced that the two other Americans and I at Food for the Hungry must be sisters.

Anyhow, I walk down the road and I hear kids and/or adults yell various names (besides the typical "Munu!").  "Erica! Erica!"  "Monica! Monica!"  "Chelsea! Chelsea!"  Since it's harder to explain (especially to kids) that I am not in fact the white person they know, I wave and ask them how they are.

On another note, all the kids at the Centre have stopped calling me Munu and now call me Meg.  It's fun to walk   around and hear little voices yelling my name.  I want to bring all them all home.

School and Pretzels

It's a beautiful thing to have so many young women interested in pursuing formal education and vocational training.  I've been amazed by the way they've reacted to the possibility.

If I had life my way I'd fund schooling for each of them, their children, their siblings, everyone.  In the whole world.

I am trilled by the number of girls we will be able to send, but it's hard knowing that we can't reach everyone.  Right now we're trying to make some sort of waiting list.  It's hard to look at the stories of each of these girls lives.  Each one needs assistance, so how do you narrow it down?  Do you make someone wait because only one of her parents was murdered in the war and accept the total orphan?  Each person has been through so much.  Each deserves this.

So we're working through these lists and other things - and we're making progress!  I'm really encouraged by the work we've been able to do.  I feel quite comfortable with the people who will be guiding this project once I leave.


I also invited the interns to come and make soft pretzels tomorrow morning!  I have no idea if we'll be able to do it.  I've never made pretzels and we don't have measuring cups.  Haha I'll let you know how it goes.

Education Progress

So every day this week I have traveled to the field (AKA the 5 sub counties in the Kitgum district that FH works in).  I went to meet with girls who have been to the Centre in the past and had expressed interest in returning to school.  We narrowed all the possible canidates down to 50.  I've been able to ask them questions about what kind of school they want (high school (secondary) or vocational), for how long, who would take care of the kids etc.

The women are excited to have this opportunity!

I've also started writing out their stories so that we can start pairing up the girls with people who have donated from home - I know you are anxious to hear where your money actually went.  I want to thank everyone who has donated - I have been overwhelmed by the generosity of people.  I wish you could be there with me when I tell each woman that she's going to get a second chance at an education.

Today we had a girl named Ketty who has completed Senior 1 (which is higher than most of the rest).  We asked her what she wanted to go to school for and she said she'd do a 2 year course on computers which only requires that you finish P7 - but doesn't teach you enough to get a job with computers.  I asked her why she didn't want to complete secondary.  She dropped her eyes and said that she couldn't do anything.  I accepted that she chose this tech course but told her to think about secondary and to let us know if she changed her mind.  (This conversation was with one of our interns as the interpretor).

About an hour later Ketty called me over and confidently said she wanted to pursue her secondary education despite having a daughter and the father saying that she'd be no good in school.  The intern was so moved by her change of heart that she offered to give Ketty her old texts books and to help her with some of the tough concepts.  She spent about 20 minutes encouraging her.  It was great to see one girl who came from Kitgum and is now finishing at a university in Kampala encouraging another to see past the limitations that others have put on her.

I also had a ton of fun seeing people that were at the Centre last time I was here - they're shocked when they realize that they recognize me!



PS I met with one of our girls instructors today, we all talked for about an hour.  When we said we had to get going he sent his wife to bring us soda (yes, Pittsburghers I'm using the word "soda" not "pop").  We drank them and then said we were going to go again.  But he told us that the other two sodas were for us also!  If I've learned one thing about making a visit to somebody's home, it's that if you refuse something they give you it will extremely offend them.  So we looked at each other, laughed and sucked down another.  This was at 7pm, I drank two mountain dews on an empty stomach.  I am never sleeping tonight.

An Unfortunate Turn of Events

Dang it.  I had really bad hives all over my body last night.  I thought it was a fluke.  Tonight it's the same but even worse...

The only change in my diet that it can be attributed to? - Mangoes.


Short lived joy.

Mango Mayhem

I bought 35 mangoes for 93 cents.  I am very happy.

Bombs

So as much as the news about Uganda is all over the news at home, things in my part of the country are pretty normal.  Since there are few TVs, newspapers are uncommon and internet is even more rare, many are just hearing about the bombs in Kampala.  I was actually the one who informed many of the staff here this morning.

I've been to the Ethiopian Village restaurant, it's just down the road from our Uganda office and the home that I lived in when I studied here - maybe a 3 minute walk.  We used to watch football matches right across the street at a place that actually did pat you down briefly before entering.  The other bomb site is on the other side of town but I've been to the area for shopping and watching Phil's Frisbee tournament.  All the FH staff has been accounted for.

Some local staff from the UN were in our office this morning, they said that they have been aware that Somalia was a threat, they had previously threated the head offices of the UN and the World Food Program in Kampala for trying to bring peace to Somalia.  Uganda was targeted because they have peacekeeping troops in Somalia.

Also, interestingly the US embassy emailed me last week confirming my whereabouts in the country.  The email said they were just confirming that US citizens were within the region that they registered with the embassy to be in.  I have no evidence but I'm wondering if they had an inkling that something could happen.

Don't worry about my safety too much, no terrorists would hit the north.  It's too rural here and unconnected to the central government for the Somalis to try to make a point.  However, I don't think I'll be taking a trip to Kampala in the next few weeks for the peace of mind of my parents.

Also, one of the people injured was from my University - I don't know him but apparently is is going to be alright but has leg injuries.  So you can pray for him but also be praying for the families of those killed.  These people were completely innocent, they did nothing wrong except attend the biggest football match of the year.

Thanks for all the emails and concern,
Me

Safe.

If you've been anywhere near the news you've probably seen that there was a bomb attack in Kampala targeting people who were watching the world cup.  Right now it looks like at least 60 people were killed.  They're suspecting Somalian terrorists who consider Uganda their enemy.

I'm the most North that you can get in Uganda and Kampala is in the South so it wasn't close to me.  I have yet to hear if anyone from Food for the Hungry was affected.  The Ethiopian Village restaurant, where the first bomb went off, is just down the road from the FH office in Kampala.

I'll let you know more information as it comes.

Itye Maber?

-  I made a mistake -Washing all of my underwear last night without thinking about the dilemma between wet underwear and no underwear that I would have in the morning.

-  In other news, I deleted solitaire and all 5 seasons of How I Met Your Mother from my computer.

Today I traveled with Josephine to the school where her daughter is attending.  She's doing well in school but you can tell she misses her mom, being in a boarding school at the age of 6 has to be hard.  I don't know how so many kids do it, when I was 6 I was still a wild child!

I always find it fascinating to travel to the areas around here.  It makes you realize how hard it was to protect the people here from the rebels when they were attacking.  Previously, most people lived on their own plots of land with maybe 3 or 4 huts together. The next hut could be a half mile away or more.  Then think about the area around it; the grass in the bush can be 6 feet tall, which was easy for rebels to hide in and then attack the hut, killing the people, abducting them or stealing food and anything useful.

But now that the rebels are gone some people are moving away from the IDP camps and back to the former way of living.  And it seems to be going well for those who can afford to rebuild their houses.  Unfortunately, many can't rebuild or don't own any land (land passes through the paternal side of the family but with broken families due to the war, separation and AIDS, many have no inheritance).

This week is going to be crazy busy, I'm traveling to the field every day to talk with girls who are hoping to get into school with our scholarships.  I'm praying that we get the right girls and that this can really transform their lives.  Will update you soon.

It has always been a mystery to me how men can feel themselves honored by the humiliation of their fellow beings. - Mahatma.

Funeral

The guests were supposed to arrive between 9 and 10am.  Naturally, we got there around 10:30 and were some of the first people there.  The service was supposed to last from 10:30-12:30.  Naturally, it went from 11:45-5pm.

There were probably 700 people there, the local technical school had all the construction students put up bamboo and tarp structures for people to sit under.  A couple schools and NGOs brought in hundreds of chairs but still there were a lot of people sitting on the ground.  Even the local government officials came for the event.

I'm used to funerals in the States where even the closest family tries to stay composed.  But here you're allowed to freely express your grief.  Guests would wail when they came, the students from her school would yell, her sister almost passed out saying goodbye as she lifted her hands and screamed.

The tradition is to have the body spend one night in the home and then be buried the next day, so they brought the coffin out of the house while everybody was singing etc. Being a Christian community, they sang a lot of worship songs filled with "ayayayyayaya"s from the women.  Since English is the overlying language since there are so many tribes in Uganda, most of the service was translated from Acholi to English for us.

Then it was time for the burial.  All 700 of us walked about 10 minutes to a plot of land owned by the family.  We looked like a mass exodus, filling the paths, moving like water around houses and such.  People came to watch, children came to watch.  And, I think I've mentioned a couple times how kids yell "Munu!" when I pass (meaning white person).  Well, in this completely inappropriate time they did it too.  (Obviously they had no idea that it wasn't the time).

So we got to the open grave, sang, and lowed the casket down with rope.


Matthew stayed pretty composed the whole time although you could tell that he had been crying previously.  He spoke and told the whole story of her sickness and death.  I'll summarize  she's always had nosebleeds but they got worse a couple months ago.  She was in and out of the hospital.  When she was at home, she would cuddle up on his lap.  This last time she was sick it was because she had lost so much blood with nosebleeds that her body couldn't keep up and her heart wasn't getting enough flow.

They had to transfuse her but there is no blood bank here.  Her platelet count had become too low.  They tested her relatives and found a donor.  Then, the machine that was monitoring her heart and blood broke on a Friday.  They told Matthew it would be fixed on Monday but that there were no other machines in the hospital.

Over the weekend Matthew was trying to find an ambulance to take her to Kampala but the hospital said one of their vehicles was broken and the other had too many flat tires.  All the other organizations in town had long processes to be able to use their ambulance.  So finally FH got an ambulance from Kampala to come and pick her up.

As they neared Kampala her condition was deteriorating.  They said they had to give another injection and she looked at her dad and said "no more injections."  When they got to the hospital she was in horrible shape, I'm not sure if they had started CPR yet but they knew her heart was failing.  Matthew said that she got the best attention possible, all of the doctors were ready to receive her and all tried to rescue her but it was too late.

I keep thinking how easily we could have helped her in the States.  You can cauterize the veins in the nose to stop the bleeding, you can give her a saline drip to stay hydrated, you can even get plasma from the blood bank to help with clotting.  Unfortunately that just isn't here.  But then I think, if it was God's will for her to go then he may have taken her no matter what medicine she received.

It's just hard to think that she didn't receive the best possible treatment out there.

Death in the FH family

The first day I was here we prayed for the 15 year old daughter of one of our staff.  They prayer was that she would be able to return to school soon after dealing with a long illness.  She was having really serious nosebleeds that kept happening.

Throughout the next few weeks we've been praying for her almost every day.  Matthew (the staff member) would update us that she's back home, she's back in the hospital, then she was in a coma, she was awake again.  The blood loss was seriously affecting her heart.  A lot of us kept talking to him about taking her to a hospital in Kampala, Kitgum just doesn't have enough doctors for advanced medicine but the drive is long and rough.

Yesterday morning he was finally convinced and Food for the Hungry helped by paying for ambulance transport for her and her parents.  Sometime between the time they reached the hospital and this morning she passed away.

A bunch of us went to his house today with the plan to cook and clean.  We filled 10 jerrycans with water, put them in the back of the truck that needs to be pushed to start and headed to Matthew's home.

As with tradition, there were already at least 50 people there.  Men from the local carpentry school were constructing a huge tarp covering, the local high school brought plastic chairs and the women from the community were all cooking and washing.  We went to town and bought them more food because they didn't have anywhere near enough for everybody.

Matthew has been with FH Kitgum since the start, he had been abducted and found God while in the bush and has an amazing story about how he escaped.  My cook, Concy, lived with his family for a few years, he got her the job here.  He's such a loving man who takes great care of his family and friends.

Tomorrow's the funeral, just pray for the family - the parents, siblings, everyone.  They know that she has peace now but it's hard for the people that are left behind.

Poverty is the worst form of violence. - Mahatma Gandhi


I've been thinking about this a lot and was hoping to expound on it.  But I've decided not to. So here's all I'll say:


If in order for the world to have the "haves" (us), does it also need to have the "have-nots?"  And, if this is true, does having, in turn, actually make us violent?


.

Wise man.

Poverty is the worst form of violence. - Mahatma Gandhi


Will elaborate my thoughts another time.

4th of July

I probably wrote about this last year around Halloween but I'm saying it again.  When you experience a holiday in another country you realize that it really is just another day.  There is no red, white and blue, no parties, no days off of work, nothing.  Even the new Americans here haven't said anything about it, I would have forgotten completely if it wasn't for the internet.

On the topic of my homeland, I'm beginning to realize that my cynicism about America is just not helpful for me or anybody else.  Yes, many parts of the work hate us, and no, I don't completely blame them in some/many cases.  But where I am is just out of a crisis and the US has put in effort to help out.  I think I need to take a picture of the "Hospital funded by USAID - help from the people of the United States" so whenever I want to strangle our government I will relax a bit because that hospital has saved the lives of many of my friends.

I also appreciate the equality among people that we have in America.  The fact that kids are taught growing up that they are worth something (even if that makes them overly proud in many cases).  Many girls from the villages, especially ones who returned from the war, think they are worthless in comparison to people in the town or people with any kind of power.  The respect that they give them is fine, I won't argue about courtesying or anything, but it's after the initial respect, the fact that they remain on their knees, head bowed, that they talk quietly or not at all to educated people, that they won't ask for what they need and they won't trouble anyone higher than them for anything that gets to my heart.

If I meet a doctor, a university student or a teacher I will give them a firm handshake and look them straight in the eye.  I know that despite their certificates, education, whatever, that I am on their same level.  But it's very structured here to where one stands.

Other things about America that I am thankful for today:

- Roads.  I appreciate the fact that I pay taxes and that the government uses that money to build me roads that I won't ever appreciate.

- Checks and balances.  I want to thank whoever crafted this idea, there is so much corruption among the central government that the people really suffer.  While we have corruption and scandals, I'm thankful that we generally punish those involved.

- Smoothies.  I could really go for one right now.  Or a grande light java chip frappachino, no whip.  I've been having fantasies about them.

- Minimum wage and strict child labor laws.

- Vaccinations.


- Police.  Being able to call them and not having to pay their bribes to come and help you.


- Recycling.  My soul throws up a little everyday when I have to throw 4 plastic bottles into the fire pit.  Sorry Ozone.

- Unlimited calls.  This buying airtime every couple days and paying by the second business is rough.

- Ice.


Don't get me wrong, I could write a book about things that I love about Uganda more than America, but today isn't about being cynical.  Thank you America for the things that you get right.

Weekendd

Two of my friends came to visit this weekend.  Phil Wilmot goes to my school, he studied abroad here in another program while I was here and fell in love with a girl named Suzan Abong.  So he's back here for the summer and they're traveling around Uganda visiting various people.

It was great to see them, they're very cool with just chilling.  We never had an agenda but just had a good time talking, slowly walking to various places like town and visiting some people's homes - oh and we also watched the Ghana/America match!  We were in a small semi-restaurant in town, with the first goal people glanced at us to see if we were cheering or not.  Phil and I were hardcore cheering for Ghana.

Never eat before you go to the home of a Ugandan, they will feed you, lots.  We went to Concy's home on Sunday, she lives in one small room with four her sister, friend and two orphaned cousins.  Regardless of her living arrangements, she welcomed us and cooked us fried cassava and beans.  Delish.

In other news, two Americans came to the Centre yesterday, they'll be here for 3 weeks.  One is a teacher and one works at a college, they seem great, it's interesting having other Americans here.  The staff kept saying "your friends are coming," despite the fact that I didn't know them at all.  Our country would be a lot different if we considered everyone to be our brother or sister as they do (at least within tribes) here.

Various thoughts.

I thought I'd just tell you about different things I've noticed/experienced lately.

• I was driving through the bush from one of the villages that is really far from town.  We passed some school children who were going home.  As we drove by all of the girls knelt in respect for our vehicle. And it wasn't like they saw me and knew I was a foreigner, I was in the back seat.  But at this specific school they're taught to kneel when somebody passes while the boys can yell and wave and do whatever.  What does this teach them about gender roles?  The other Ugandans I was traveling with said they don't support that kind of education but that in the schools deep in the bush that is what's taught.
• An American grad student came to the Centre one day last week for part of her research.  I was typing away when she came and didn't say anything to her because she was talking to my supervisor.  When they were done she sat waiting, I asked her a couple questions like "where are you in school" but that was about all.  When she left the man who works in my office just started laughing and said "I will never understand your culture, if we see someone of the same color skin we think they're our brother and we greet them and are excited, but you guys don't treat each other any differently."  
• My friend Phil Wilmot and Susan Abong came to visit yesterday, they're traveling through Uganda together and stopped here for the weekend!
• I've been able to talk to a lot of girls who are wanting to go back to school.  It's so encouraging.  One even went to tailoring school already, she was able to pay the $5 admission fee but she doesn't have any fabric or anything to work with so she just sits and watches. We're going to pay the rest of her fees and buy her the needles and fabrics she needs so she can put what she's learning into practice.
• God is good.  All the time.  These girls teach me that much more than I could ever teach them.

So my cook here in Uganda is a also a tailor. She teaches basic tailoring to the girls that come through the Centre.  She's my age and she singlehandedly is paying for her sister to attend secondary school and taking care of her orphaned nieces and nephews.  She's hoping to be able to buy a special kind of sewing machine so she can expand her enterprise.

I told her I'd tell my friends about it and see if they were interested. So here's the deal:

Skirts - $10-15
Dresses - $15
Bags - $10
Set of ten napkins - $8
Aprons - $10

Other things - just give me your ideas and we'll see what we can do!

Here's the link to pictures of a bunch of fabrics (examples of skirts and dresses are at the end)!  Email me (meganclapp@gmail.com) what you'd like and appropriate measurements!   We'll settle up once I get home!



See Fabric Selections Here!!

New Pal

This is my new friend Tier (pronounced: "tea-A").  She's fabulous, one of the mothers here asked whose family I belonged in and she said "ours!" and gave me a big hug.

Alumni Success

As I was visiting some schools in the community I had the chance to see some of the girls that were at the Centre last time I was here.  They had no idea I was back so when they saw me they dropped their things and ran to me in surprise.  One girl, Beatrice, took me to the market where she has started a small business with the knowledge and startup money that she got from the Centre.  She has also started at the tailoring school in her village.  In the morning she sells small fish and these pastry like things called mandazzi and then in the afternoon she goes to the school.  In the small market we ran into about 6 girls who had been in the Centre at various times in the past.

This is Beatrice at her stand in the market place.

This is the reason that the Centre exists, these girls used to sit at home or dig in fields for very little money but they are now beginning to be entrepreneurs.  Their lifeless eyes are gone and they are now happy and proud of what they've become.

These are all the Centre alumni that we found in the market.

This guy is living right outside my house.

Reality

I had one of those moments today when you realize that you're alive.  Like when you're looking in the mirror and suddenly realize that you are there, brings you back to reality.  Today was one of those days.

I was kicking around a soccer ball with some of the girls from the Centre when I realized where I was.  Here I am in Northern Uganda kicking around a soccer ball with a woman who is HIV+, another who spent 11 years living in abduction and another who is a child mother/rape victim.

A little later I wandered into the kitchen and started talking to the one of the girls, Colline, who was cooking.  She asked me to take a picture of her.  I said I would.  She then slightly lifted up her skirt to show me the back of her thigh where she was hit by part of a bomb while she was abducted.  She's basically missing all of the back of her thigh to the bone.  What she wanted was for me to take a picture of it so that she could see what it looks like from behind.  I only had my video camera so I filmed a couple seconds of it and showed it to her.

She just watched and turned back to cooking.  She then asked to see it again.  She said that this was the first time that she's actually seen it and put her hand on her head and asked if that really was her leg.  I asked her what she thought about it and she said that she didn't have anything to say yet.


Reality.
.

As requested, here is a picture of some of the dead white ants that were in my house last weekend!

I need to update this more

It has been a while since I've written something of substance.  I realized that I haven't talked at all about the new group of girls that is here at the Centre.  Last Monday we went out to a couple of the villages and picked up the girls for the program.  We have 25 women and 33 of their children, all under the age of 7.  It has become much more lively around the compound since they arrived.

All of the girls are considered child mothers and were either formerly abducted victims of LRA rebels, or are victims of gender based violence at home or orphans themselves.  Almost none have husbands who are still alive or haven't left them and a majority of the children are from rapes.

They are adjusting well to life at the Centre, it's great to see them from the first day when they are silent, won't look you in the eye and barely even talk to their children to just a week later when they are singing and dancing with each other (and begging me to join) and playing with their kids.  Simply giving them a small break from their home life brings so much relief to them.

Their classes started this week - literacy, English, agriculture, basic tailoring, cooking and business studies.  And the kids began their nursery classes as well.

Over the next two months they'll be taking these classes and doing almost daily counseling with the hope that at the end they will be able to return home and be active members in their villages and continue an income generating activity such as small farming or owning goats or chickens.


The scholarship program that I'm working on is also going really well; tomorrow I'll be traveling to the villages to visit various vocational schools so that we will be prepared to enroll more girls next term. So pray for guidance in our selection process of both the girls who receive the scholarships and the schools that we select.


More to come.

Ant Update

Good news: I woke up to find that there were hundreds of white ant carcases (which I found out are a kind of termite) on the floor and not still flying.

Better news: My friend came over and as she cracked up about me being afraid of them, swept them all up for me.

Strange news: She took them to the girls here at the centre to pluck their wings and add to the thousands of white ants that they caught last night to prepare to eat.

Pictures to come, the power is out and my computer is running low on battery.  (I have a wireless modem so electricity doesn't affect the internet).

Peace

SCARED

Oh my gosh, I just had the all time scariest moment that I've had so far.  Let me preface this by saying I was not in mortal danger.

So, last weekend some of the security guards were showing me the "queen" of this type of ant that is here.  They're called white ants.  Don't be fooled though these are nothing like our ants.  They are as big as grasshoppers and have huge, loud wings.  Anyhow, the queen was absolutely disgusting because it was laying eggs.

Anyhow, I got past that.  Then tonight I was sitting with some of the girls here at the center.  It started getting dark and as I began to leave I noticed this bug flying near the light, one girl told me "white ants, they've very nice to eat."  No thanks, I chuckled and then kept walking.  So I get to my room and turn on the lights.  And there it was, one big white ant flying around my light.  "HELL  NO" I thought, and maybe said.  I turned on the light to the other room (my house is two rooms) and turned mine off.  I fooled it and it left.  Shut the door and took a shower.

So I get out of the shower and I'm pretty happy, it's been a good day.  I'm ready to go get dinner (it's almost 8pm) and I open the door... to find hundreds of white ants flying all around that room.  I slammed the door shut, mumbled some expletives like "oh golly this is bad" and "gee wiz, get me the heck out of here."  (it may not have been in those exact terms but you get the point)

But it didn't end there, they started coming into my room under the door!  Fluttering around making all kinds of terrible noises.  I hit the lights and dove for cover under my mosquito net (which I've never been as happy to have).  As I sat there trembling I heard these bugs everywhere around me.  I slowly heard the sounds diminish as they followed the light and left under the door at which point I jumped out of my hiding place, grabbed a blanket and threw it over the base of the door.

Whew, I think they're all out, except for the fact that above the door is a window type thing that you can't close. But they seem to like the light so I thought I was in the clear and that they'd stay in that room.  No.  Of course the power chose now to go out.  So that room is dark.

I am now writing this from under a big blanket to block the light of the computer although it must be 100 degrees in my room.

Oh my gosh.

Drunkeness

This morning's Bible study was focused around Romans 12:1-2 which led to the discussion about people in the local communities and if they are living to be sacrifices for God and following God's will.  It was brought up that in the two villages where the current group of women are from, there is a huge alcohol problem.  The man speaking spoke of a time he was in both the villages in the morning and the majority of men were drunk/drinking already and sitting around doing nothing.  These men leave the women to do all the work.  And it's true, the women are the ones who not only take care of the children, wash the clothes, clean the house but also earn all of the money for the family by digging in the fields all day while many of the husbands drink away the families food money.

This is so completely opposite of our masculine philosophy of men being the bread winners, being productive, providing for their family.  In single mother homes it's hard for the women to take on the role of both man and woman but here most women are like single mothers even if their husband is still married to them.

This is obviously not to say that there aren't good men here, there certainly are.  But what most of the women that come to the center are facing is this: either they have no husband, or their husband is unreliable to share the burden of taking care of the family.

Josephine looking through the photo album I brought of her and her kids.

Matthew receiving a book that Rachel sent for him.

This weekend was really great; since the women haven’t come to the center yet and the staff was gone I got to spend a lot of time with the two girls who motivated me to start this scholarship program.  On Saturday Josephine and I went into town and bought a bicycle (with money two of my friends from school gave me) for her so that she can travel to school (which is more than an hour’s walk) easier.  I also got to discuss with them the difficulties that are having with going to school, like not having enough food or money to buy things like soap and ways that we can fix that.

On Sunday I went to church, which isn’t called church here, it’s called “prayer.”  So it’s not “are you going to church?” but rather, “are you going to pray?”  The service is actually held in the pavilion on our compound so that’s convenient.  There is an organization here called “Far Reaching Ministries,” they work with orphanages, churches (including the one here) and other things.  Anyhow, there are always one or two Americans here in Kitgum with them; there is a new family since last time I was here, they have two biological kids and have adopted 7 or 8 Ugandan children.  I liked them immediately. 

On another note, if you were reading my blog last time you may remember that I lost my Bible here.  Well, guess what showed up this morning?  Yeah, my bible.  And better yet, I left my new Bible in Egypt so once again I was Bible-less in Kitgum.  It’s awesome to have it back, funny how those things work.

Also, it's rainy season now so it's rained a little bit about every other day.  Last time I think it rained once the whole time we were here!

Readjusting to Life in Kitgum

Meeting with Josephine again was great, we got to talk about things that she needs in order to go to school on Monday.  For example, she was able to rent a room near the school for $10 a month so we went out and bought a mattress, lantern, soap etc.  As we walked back to where she is staying I was carrying the rolled up mattress and everyone was shouting to me to carry it on my head.  I tried and it fell off.  I still haven’t mastered the whole using your head instead of your hands thing.

The new group of girls that are coming to the centre don’t come until Monday so the compound is extremely quiet this weekend with me being the only one living here.  So instead of sitting here all day I’ve decided to go to Josephine’s daughter’s primary school.  She was able to start school last term thanks to a very early donation and is apparently excelling and loving every minute of it.  I can’t wait to see her.

Onto even more exciting news, the white rice, white flour, oil and beans diet has begun.  Yummm.

I have arrived at my final destination (Kitgum)!  Took a long, bumpy bus ride from Kampala up here and am now settled in.  The women that come for the program here have not moved in yet so it's very quiet without all of them and their children but they should be here in the next week or so.

Anyhow, one of the girls that I met here last time is coming from her village to visit.  I can't wait to see her and her son.  She's one of the people that I kept in contact with since I left.

It feels surreal to be back here, living in the same place I did before, but without the two other students who were here last time.

Since I don't have anything too exciting to talk about I'll leave it at that.

Peace

Arrived to Uganda safely but 8 hours later than expected with a long delay in Ethiopia and a surprise trip to Rwanda.  All is well.

Things I have learned in Egypt

1. Weekends are Friday and Saturday - not  Saturday and Sunday.
2. Many men have a bruise/callous looking spot on their forehead from their head hitting the ground during prayer.
3. Tipping the woman who hands you toilet paper in the bathroom with US coins because that's all you have will make her smile.
4. Only the white cabs have meters, if you take a black cab you will likely be ripped off.
5. Your international student ID (like isic) will get you into everywhere half price.
6. There are bad drivers here.
7. There are even worse pedestrians.
8. Many taxi drivers do not speak any English, good luck.
9. Papa Johns, Pizza Hut and Dominoes can be delivered to your door.
10. You will buy more than .5 kg of souvenirs.  Plan accordingly.

Leaving Tonight-ish

Leave for the airport at midnight.  Flights to Uganda begin at 3:20am.

Video Clips of Rug Making

This is in Cairo's garbage city, a organization where they teach very young girls how to make rugs and pay them a reasonable wage.




The little girl teaching me how to make a rug out of recycled material.

Christians in the Dump

Quite literally, Some Christians that live in Cairo live in a garbage city.  All of the trash from Cairo is picked up by these men and brought the city.  The women (who never wear the gloves supplied to them) then sort through it and organize it, green bottles here, cardboard there etc.  Then it goes on to the next level where it is shredded and in many cases melted down to make other things.  They are able to reuse much more than we do.

So why the Christians?  Brief history: these Egyptians converted to Christianity in the 1st century [insert tons of history here] and have been here since.  They are known as the Coptic Christians and a group of them  found that they can make their livelihoods sorting garbage.

They live on the side of Cairo, somewhat on the side of a cliff.  Most people in Cairo don't even know where this place is.  A couple NGOs have set up schools and places for young women to work for fair wages making rugs out of recycled rugs etc.  Anyhow even at the schools they teach them numbers but they also teach them about what can and can't be recycled.  It's fascinating, many of them aren't living as poorly as you would imagine, the roads are a mess but apparently the actual apartments are clean.  Unfortunately diseases are common.

Anyhow, further up the hill is the monastery.  It's clean and gorgeous, there are carvings all over the side of the cliff and the actual chapels themselves are in caves.  The largest on is in the side of the hill and seats 10,000 people for church!  It's incredible, most of it is within the rock itself.  Absolutely fascinating.

       

Egypt is an incredible place to be.  There are cars that honk constantly, people walking around, the Nile that I can see from our apartment and history that is to die for.  Cairo is huge and bustling at all hours of the day.  So far I've visited the Egyptian Museum (which has artifacts that have been found in the tombs etc.), the Giza pyramids and museum and the Saqqara pyramids, tombs and museum.  Got to walk (or crawl) inside a bunch of them to see where the kings were buried and all the wall writings and pictures.  Many still have the original color paint, 4,000 years later!  Amazing.

(PS if you are a student traveling, bring you international student ID!  I've been able to get into everything half price with it! - teachers, you can get one too)

It's also fascinating that throughout the day the Muslim call to prayer is announced loudly across the entire city, some men (the women aren't required to participate, but can chose to do so) stop in their tracks to pray and the mosques are filled for a brief time.  

This got me thinking about how no matter where a person is, they are reminded like 7 times a day to worship and pray to their God, Allah.  There are days that I go hours without thinking of God let alone praying and worshiping.  Wouldn't our faith be different if wherever we lived in a place where a reminder to pray came over the announcements at intervals throughout the day? (although there are some areas where at least church bells are run)  Or are we called to remind each other of this out of actions and words?

Rome

Electronics and I do not get along.  Never have, never will.

I sent the camera I bought before studying abroad in to be fixed - they said it would be back in time for my trip.  Not to be.  So I'm now borrowing my mom's, which is good but doesn't have near the zoom or mega-pixels as mine.

Then at JFK I plugged in my computer to try and get online (don't be fooled, it's not free like in Pittsburgh).  I was talking on the phone as I packed up my stuff and walked to my plane.  Got on the plane and realized - no charger, left it plugged in.  I asked to run and get it but they said it was too late (although we waited at the gate for another 20 minutes).

Thus, I am without my camera and my charger.  Good start :-)

My flight leaves Rome for Cairo in about two hours.  I'll be in Egypt until Sunday night, staying with my Dad's cousin then off to Uganda!

Peace

Video Clip: (Pictures and Bible Verses)

Education Fund!

Good news!  After working out the details of everything, the first round of scholarship money has successfully gone through and 3 girls are already in school! We are now ready to implement the program on a larger scale.

For most of you, you know of the education fund that I'm talking about because you followed my blog while I was in Uganda or we have talked since then and you asked for more info.  OR perhaps you have no idea what I'm talking about and I accidentally added you to the list (I won't be offended if you let me know that you aren't interested so I know not to bother you with further emails).


So here's the deal: Food for the Hungry (a Christian development organization - www.fh.org) and I are trying to provide the women that I worked with in the village of Kitgum in Northern Uganda in Fall, 2009 (all victims of gender based violence, abduction or trauma) with the fees that they need to finish their education.

In many cases the women were abducted by a rebel group during their school years or were forced to stop schooling in order to work in the fields for their family or marry and have children.  Now they are between the ages of 17 and 21 and have such a willing desire to get an education but they have no money to pay for fees because they are struggling day to day to even feed their kids.

Most of the girls are interested in vocational training with the aim of studying tailoring, sewing, etc.  Others want to attend secondary school (roughly the equivalent of high school) and a few are still young enough to return to primary school.

But we need your help!  Above all I would appreciate all the prayers than I can get about this.  But we also can't do this without financial support.  As you probably know, I hate asking for money... But, here I am asking, if you can, to please think about helping us make a huge difference in the lives of these Ugandan women.

I will be going back to Northern Uganda for two and a half months this summer to continue implementing this project and to record the stories of the girls that you will be helping.  And thanks to God's grace, I will be receiving a grant from my college to pay for all of my traveling fees which is certainly a blessing for a college student.


Here are some more details:

Where would your money go?

• Not to us!  No administration fees will be taken out by Food for the Hungry -- each and every cent will get to the women.
• School fees
  
• A uniform
  
• A food stipend for the girls and their children (depending on their personal access to food)
  
• School materials (books, paper, pencils, etc.)
• Necessities (bedsheets, jerrycans, hoes, etc.)

What would a one year scholarship look like?

• A one year scholarship, that would include all of the above, would be about $150-$400 depending on what level of schooling and what school the woman will be going to.
  
• You, the scholarship provider, would receive stories and pictures of the women that you are assisting and would have the opportunity to send letters and items to them.

Is this sustainable?

• The last thing that we want is for the women to become reliant on foreign aid.  That is why we are not just giving them food or just money for food but are primarily providing a scholarship for them to get the education they need so that they can support themselves and their family without relying on charity.

How to help:

• First and foremost, please pray for the girls because ultimately this is all about them.
• If helping financially is something that you can do:
  
  
  • Mail your check to 

               Food for the Hungry 
               Attention of Teresa Craig

               1224 E. Washington St.
                Phoenix, AZ 85034-1102

• 
  
• Put "Go ED alumni scholarship fund - Uganda" on the memo line.
• You may also get the check (payable to Food for the Hungry, as above) to me or my parents and we will mail it on to Food for the Hungry.
  
• **Note: this is a tax deductible donation and you will receive a confirmation of receipt.

• I know we all love doing these things online but snail mail has proved to be the best way since this particular donation will have no administration fees taken out.
• Please let me know if you do choose to send something, so that I can confirm it with Teresa Craig and ensure that the funds flow properly.
• Again, I'm not suggesting an amount - the donation could be for anything from helping buy a school uniform to as much as sponsoring one or more girls for the year.  It's also up to you whether you donate every month or once.  This all depends on you and your preferences/capabilities.

Check out my blog posts from October to read more about the project and my experience there.

If you have any other questions, please don't hesitate to ask me.  I would love to discuss this project further with you.